Back in 2007, I began working with a Guatemalan birth mother searcher as her translator. In the 8 years since, I’ve worked with hundreds of adoptive families as they have navigated the process of searching for their children’s birth families. Each of their stories has been unique and each has taught me something new. For quite a while I have been thinking of starting a blog as a way to share what I’ve learned. But there have been a few things that have held me back. Here are some of the fears I’ve had about writing this blog:
- I won’t be able to find the time to write regularly
- It’s too hard to put into words a lot of the feelings I have around adoption and birth families
- I have enough on my plate and don’t need one more commitment
- I’m not an expert on any of this, just a mom
- I’m a very private person and am not comfortable sharing my personal life on the Internet
- My daughter may not appreciate me sharing our family stories
- I don’t have the right to share personal information of other families
- I don’t want to come off as if I am selling a particular service
- Maybe no one cares about what I have to say
But recently, with some other projects that are rising to the top of my priority list in life, I’ve become more open to getting over these fears and am thinking that the benefits of a blog could outweigh those fears. Here are some of the benefits I see of writing a blog:
- When I get questions in email, rather than answering them incompletely or not as personally as I want to because of lack of time, I could refer to a blog post
- Rather than answer the same questions over and over in email I could refer people to blog posts and maybe that will actually save me time
- I have a unique view into the world of searching and life in Guatemala as an adoptive mom and feel a bit of an obligation to share what I can in the hope it can help other families
- With the advent of the Familias de Corazón foundation and the launching of its website, I have a place for the blog to live that would not have to be a personal site and which might lend a voice to the work of the foundation
- The discipline of writing regularly and the challenge of figuring out how to share information in a personal way without disclosing personal details of my daughter or other families could actually be a challenge that I am ready for right now
- Writing a blog could open up doors to deepen relationships with adoptive parents I am already in touch with as well as to start relationships with families I have not yet met
- The blog could serve as a forum for other adoptive parents to share their stories and connect with one another
So I have decided to give this a go. My goal is to publish one post a week. I want to talk about concerns adoptive families have before, during and after searching; what being found and contact is like for birth mothers; what the challenges of searching are for the searcher; what birth family meetings are like, how adoptive families are managing relationships with birth families, and a lot more. I hope to include interviews with adoptive families who have had successful searches and those who have not, perhaps interviews with searchers and maybe even birth mothers. And I have access to a wealth of data on search success rates and reasons for unsuccessful searches that could be interesting to analyze and discuss.
But mostly I want to provide information that is of value to adoptive parents. So please let me know in the comments below or by sending me an email what topics you are interested in. And I’d also love to know if you are interested in sharing your story in a guest post or an interview format.
And of course, if this sounds of interest to you, I’d love for you to subscribe to the blog by visiting www.familiasdecorazon.org. (Just scroll to the footer on any page and provide your name and email address and you will be automatically subscribed).
Abrazos!
Velvet